Final Posting: a technical note

A Technical Note

This is just to say,
Only a technical note really,
That as of today,
I am stopping posting:
No, my feelings have not changed,
Deepened maybe. A new photo,
Sepia-toned, breaks my heart again.
Everything I love in your face
Is in that photo, and you
Looked happy - God bless you, I hope you are -
Next to the note which says, "Gone whale watching!"
Oh, I hope you submerge together in a sea
Of happiness, and if I never see you again,
Still you will keep inspiring my Return in Italy
As Caterina Martinelli inspired her Claudia,
And, who knows, life transforms itself into
So many strange shapes, maybe there will be
A return for us.

In any case,
I am so thankful I did not
Die that day
.that day before I had tasted
.the full mystery of life and seen your face,
.the face I love,
.the love I carry.
Oh, I'll always carry the hope
You may think of me one more time.

Here's a final wish for you:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OdCVlmmnOzA

Trying to Forget You

You won't believe the hours
I've spent looking at your picture,
Trying to forget you.

Not the smartest thing, is it?
But it's all I can do,
So there it is.

-

Goodbye

Rachel,

You were a string player before
you became a singer, and this
song has nice strings. It's my
goodbye song to you:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kpbMitv5Ypo

If I'm lucky enough to die before
you, I can hope you'll someday know
how I feel about you. I do believe
life is a mystery, and love unlimits us;
but will you be surprised when my letters
arrive and you come upon these poems
and you realize about the Swedish
Girl letter, Papageno's Gift and Torna,
Torna and Love Songs for One
Not Expected to Return, that they were
all written for you, all my trying to make
sense of my love for you.

I bet you'll be astounded to know that
for me the mystery of my life and my work -
what is the difference for the true artist
really? - has all been tied up in you.

If I never said I loved you,
Now you know I tried,
Babe, now you know I tried.

I love you, Rachel. Goodbye.

Oh Rachel

Oh, Rachel,
I love you. I love you.
I love you. I love you,

But

Time to let you go.
am I able?

Goodbye, Rachel.

Nothing Tonight

Nothing tonight,
Nothing but missing you.
Death speaks,

"Let your words go and live in her
And you come and die in me,
For you will be more alive if your
Thoughts live where you desire to be,
Than if you keep living, knowing that
She never thinks of you."